Mira + Brian’s Blog

The other night Brian and I were walking through the main bazaar area in Polelom and came across a local artist.  I’ve been trying to find some artwork to bring back with me but so far I’ve only seen the prototypical paintings of the taj mahal and intepretations of the bhagvad gita.  Nothing on the walls of this shop indicated that the artist had anything unique.  I started asking him if he had any artwork with sanscrit on it, hoping for find some artwork with scriptures (or at least something different and unique).  Hidden under his main showcase window and inside a little suitcase he started pulling out absolutely BEAUTIFUL pieces.  He had used some printmaking techniques on really old paper that I just loved.  As I watched him talk about the pieces I could see that these were the paintings he really enjoyed.. the ones you create for yourself.. not the mainstream stuff you sell, but the things that push you as an artist and perhpas not so accessible for the average tourist.  It reminded me of one of my paintings which everyone seems to love.. the big one with the red flowers.. and how I can’t seem to get attached to it because it doesn’t mean anything to me.  I wasn’t trying a new technique or trying to convey some deeper message.. it’s just flowers and sunlight.  And for some reason, it’s the one that everyone loves.  And there lies the problem with being a full-time artist.  You will never sell the work that is truly unique and creative.  People want pictures of the taj mahal or flowers and if you want to be successful, you have to create what people want.  Guess I can’t quit my day job   As I walked away from the artist, I couldn’t help noticing the grin on his face for selling the pieces that meant something to him. 

And that brings me to another shout-out.. to two artists who have really influenced me over the past couple months.  Joan + Kamla from the Kirkland Arts Center.  Over the past few months I’ve become more of a printmaker than a painter.  I wasn’t expecting this when another artist, Andree Carter,  recommended I take a course to infuse my painting with more “edge”.  Printmaking sounded “safe”.. it didn’t seem like something I would get attached to and I felt that it would complement my painting.  Before I knew it, I was transformed into creating something very different from my typical paintings.  From Joan I learned a lot of creative techniques.. who knew eggshells could be so useful?  I also appreciated her eye for what was missing in a piece and what I could do to tie it all together.  Kamla, my instructor, had a very different teaching style that I only truly appreciated recently.  She never showed us her artwork.  I always wondered why and after some time we learned that she wanted us to develop our own style and voice before she showed us hers.  It means a lot to know that my style is mine and yes it’s definitely influenced by other artists but I’m starting to have my own voice.  Kamla and Joan.. I’m looking foward to coming back to the studio.  My head is full of ideas and I can’t wait to get them in oil and paper   Oh, and btw.. I’m planning on visiting a handmade paper factory in a few days.  I hope they have some good stuff I can bring back! 

Whoops, 3 weeks between shout outs is not what I intended….I promise to get better

Today’s shout out goes to Mom and Dad Lane.  Obviously, it’s difficult to say just how important your parents are to you, after all they made you, raised you, and financed your sorry butt for a couple of decades.  Needless to say, I love them very much   And so does their new daughter-in-law and new Golden Child, Mira.

One of the best things about my parents is how much they give to others.  They were always the parents baking cookies for all the kids, coaching sports teams, shuttling everyone around, taking care of family members in need, etc, etc, etc.  Extremely selfless people.  (Hmmmm, it must not be genetic.) 

Specifically, in this current context, they had the foresight to provide me the gift of foreign travel at an early age, despite having done none of it themselves.  We hosted a French foreign exchange student, Sebastien, in high school.  (Side note: this was a risky venture, forced time with a frenchman has a strong potential of becoming agonizong.  Sebastien is the coolest French-person of all time.)  They even paid for me to spend a month at Sebastien’s vacation home off the coast of France, while they worked to pay for it!  Surely they would tell you it was to get rid of me for a month, but I have a sneaking suspicion that they were trying to expand my horizons…

Thankfully, I’ve had the opportunity to turn that around, and now we even bring the Old Man along on trips!  We climbed Kilimanjaro together upon his retirement, and he’ll be joining us in Nepal.

Thanks Mom and Dad Lane!

Next up: Mom and Dad Patel.

Ahhh, the joys of a beach vacation within a trip.  Goa has been exactly as advertised, sunny, sandy, very relaxing, and a bit gluttonous.  We’ve really enjoyed our stay here, which has essentially consisted of, in order: eating, sleeping, yoga, eating, reading, and eating.  Dan, I just might eclipse your target weigh of a buck fifty (hope I didn’t kinx myself there!)

Since nothing of interest has happened in this glouriously sheltered community, I will return to the promised topic of “why are you doing this?”

The why question really boils down to three subquestions…

Why Travel?

Mira and I have both been blessed with the ability to travel a great deal in our young lives.  When we first started out traveling, separately of course, it was all about adventure, seeing things you had never seen before.  (To be honest, when I was younger I was really not all that into travel, because it required great leaps out of my comfort zone.  I do, after all, share 50% of my mom’s genetics! It generally took a healthy dose of coercing from Dan in order to get me to go.) As our trips grew more and more exotic, and provided more in the way of vast cultural change, the more we began to see the benefit to ourselves as human beings.  You have no choice but to grow an acceptance and appreciation for other cultures by visiting.  Most importantly, each time we visit these places, especially developing countries like India, we gain greater appreciation for what an amazing place in life we have in the States (and Canada, I suppose, except for the freezing weather and bad football.)

That’s the cheezy part of the answer.  To be honest, the prospect of not working for 3 months was quite appealing as well.  VERY appealing.  Mira hasn’ty taken this much time off since, well forever.  And for me, well, my days of taking 6 month chunks of time between projects appears to be coming to a close.  Which leads nicely to question #2…

Why Now?

When you tell people that you will be taking 3 months out to travel, invariably there are only 3 responses, or variations thereof: 1. Cool, I did that back in 1983, you should go to X, Y, Z places!, or 2. I wish I could do that, but I have kids, or 3. Blank stare, followed by “You can just take 3 months off from work????”.

Mira and I have been itching to travel together since we met.  We knew that we would be perfect travel companions, and we wanted to have a nice dedicated chunk of quality time before we made the fateful decision to, um, procreate.

Our initial plans called for a trip next year (2009).  That all changed, though, when all of those damn cute little ones arrived.  First it was Avery, Ben and Wendy’s super-cute  little girl.  Then, to seal the deal, Dan and Abby had to go off and produce another little cutie called Silas.  On the return trip from our first Si-viewing at the hospital, Mira turned to me and said “so, um,…… you want to travel this year instead???”  Sure! And here we are.

[Disclaimer for antsy future grandparents and/or aunts & uncles: This column in no way is meant to indicate that we will be producing progeny immediately upon our return.  We reserve the right to procreate at our leisure.  We appreciate your continued support in this matter. ]

Why India, Nepal, and Bhutan?

Finally, the question that we have been asking ourselves since we arrived here. Why India? (We’ll ask ourselves about the other countries in time!)

If you ask Mira why we are in India, she’ll tell you that first and foremost she needed to dispel the fancified ideals of the country that I have harbored since beginning my yoga practice years ago.  In my mind, India was a vast and spiritual place, inhabited mainly by gurus roaming the countryside in search of enlightenment.  Well, we can check that off the list.

India is a natural destination as the focal point of our trip.  First, Mira is Indian by culture, if not by nationality. The last time she visited India she was just a child, and she was eager to see what it would be like as an adult.  Second, I really wanted to experience the birthplace of yoga.  Third, it is warm and sunny.  Fourth, people speak English (well, enough people to get us by).  Finally, it’s cheap, meaning an extended trip wouldn’t require a third mortgage to finance. 

Hi all,

My apologies for the lengthy delay between posts.  We’ve now moved on and hopefully won’t experience the same technical difficulties.

We ended up spending a bit more time than anticipated, 4 days in all, in Mumbai (aka Bombay).  The reason: we were staying in Mira’s uncle’s penthouse apartment, and then his vacation home in a hill station just north of the city!  It’s kinda hard to pass up such great accomodation and gracious hosting.  Mira uncle Asit-Mama is a really good man, and an excellent host.  We really enjoyed our stay in the city.

Mumbai is a very cosmopolitan place, clearly flush with new money and grand desires.  It’s grown so much economically, in fact, that high end accomodations are now more expensive than Manhattan!  When Indians are buying property in SoHo because it’s such a great bargain, you know that the world is really changing   Of course, this prosperity has been very narrowly distributed, and Mumbai is also home to the largest slum in the world.

There isn’t a whole lot to see in Mumbai, at least in terms of tourist hotspots.  We took a ferry ride to a island called Elephanta, to check out some ancient caves there.  As with most other tourist attractions thus far, we were a bit disappointed.  Perhaps it’s time to better calibrate expectations!

Now, however. we have reached the promised land of India: Goa.  It’s the vacation destination of choice in the country.  We are renting a little hut a minute from the beach.  And it’s 90 degrees and sunny every day, with water perfect for swimming.  Life is very good indeed!

Some potpourri items for today…

Staff / Servants

One of the more bizarre cultural differences between the US and India is the constant presence of servants in people’s homes.  At Anu’s house (Project Why) there was a team of 4+ servants always madly cooking and cleaning.  Similarly, Asit-Mama had a personal driver and two permanent staff at his apartment.

As North Americans, especially having been raised with such a strong bent toward independence, the presence of staff is a little offputting to us.  We’re quite accustomed to doing everything ourselves, and we take pride in that independence.  This has produced some funny moments, though, mostly us trying to do something ourselves, while the staff looks on in a half-horrified, half-inquisitive way.

As with most new things, however, we’ve now become dangerously accustomed to it. Dare I say we even somewhat enjoy being pampered!  Well, sort of.  I tell you what, it would be pretty sweet to come home from work to a clean house and hot cooked meal, then retire to the antichamber afterward to sip an aperitif while someone else cleans up.  If only!

First known scam

Clearly, we’ve been overcharged for everything here, that’s the way it works.   We figured out soon after leaving Jaipur, however, that had been taken for our first scam!  We asked the rickshaw driver to take us to Galta, aka Monkey Temple.  We knew vaguely that it’s a temple on a hill outside of town, inhabited by a bunch of monkeys.  Well, he took us to the place, and we climbed the hill and came upon a small, brokeass temple.  And there were plenty of monkeys.  We were pretty disappointed, but figured that like many other tourist traps here, it was overhyped.  Well, after reading more about it when we got back, we realized that we’d been had.  The real Galta is 5+ kms out of town, and has a really nice series of temples at the top.  Oh well!  As far as scams go, this one was pretty innocuous.

The lack of “official” infrastructure in many developing countries, in addition to the huge income disparities, means tourists are constantly targeted for scams and theft.  I got a very good taste for this in my first ever real trip, to Mauritania to visit Dan about 10 years ago.  I had a 14-hour layover in the airport in Dakar, Senegal.  (First lesson: long layovers in scary airports are bad, pay the extra $100 and fly direct if possible!) Despite being told repeatedly DON’T LEAVE THE AIRPORT by Dan, I eventually wandered over to a small cafe right next door.  I ordered a beer, drank it, and chatted amiably with some local folks.  When the bill came, I was told that it would cost $100.  For a beer!?  I said no, that’s ridiculous, and my pleasant hosts suddenly started to become very agitated and angry.  They called a bunch of their friends, and suddenly I was surrounded by an angry mob demanding their $100.  I was horrified!  What a way to start.  I somehow settled for $50 (for a 50 cent beer) and got the hell out of there, cursing myself for not having followed the very explicit instructions.  (second lesson: stand up for yourself, even if people are trying to intimidate you.) (third and most important lesson: listen to people who know!)

It gets even better.  After having finally endured my 14 hour layover in Dakar, I boarded the plane to Nouakchott.  When we landed, the pilot told everyone to stay in their seats.  Two guys with machine guns boarded the plane, and made a beeline straight for me, the only white guy on the plane.  “Mr Lane, avec nous.”  Uh oh, this can’t be good.  They took me off the plane, then started berating me in French.  They were saying “where’s your ticket?” over and over and over.  My limited French ended somewhere between ticket and boarding pass, so I wasn’t able to properly communicate that I had exchanged tickets for boarding bases in New York.  They took me to a back room, where even more red-eyed military men with guns started berating me.  Welcome to Mauritania!  Thankfully, they let me fetch Dan who had come to pick me up, and he returned their berating with some of his own, and eventually we just left.  Very bizarre!  And scary.  (lesson here: in many (if not most) cultures, you need to return yelling with yelling, or people will walk all over you.  easier said than done, especially for the green traveler)

OK, we’re off to lunch.  Ciao

Sorry for the delay in posting, we’ve been wrestling with technical difficulties in the past few days.  We will provide a proper post again tomorrow at latest.  We’re off to Goa!

(Let’s just say we’re having a small problem with HTTP POST.  Meaning no emails or blog posts go out, over a certain undetermined size.  And we thought we were on vacation

does it finally work?

Hello world!  The last few days have been pretty hectic, hence no blog posts.  We’ve now settled for a bit and have access to reasonable computers, so we’re back.

Today we will have “dueling blog posts”, as we have 2 computers side by side!

So, as Mira mentioned, I had the honor of my first case of “Delhi Belly” this week.  Good times!  I spent the better part of 3 days split between the bathroom and the bed.   But, thanks to the wonders of modern medecine, I’m now back at nearly 100%.  As far as stomach ailments go, this one probably rates about a 3 out of 10 in terms of severity, 1 being full wellness and 10 being the case of giardia I picked up in Mali. (I admit that my 10 is probably Dan & Abby’s 5.  Peace Corps brings this concept to a whole new level.)

Oh, and for those concerned about the inflated cost of American health care…. a doctor visit plus 6 prescription medications totalled a whopping $11.  No wonder “medical tourism” has become so popular.

I see that Mira has provided the general update, so I’ll dive right in to some topics of interest.

Trains

It’s taken us a little while, but we’ve finally got the train system figured out.  Of course, we learned the hard way.  On our 4 hour ride from Delhi to Agra, we inadvertently ended up in 3rd class.  3rd class is basically a cattle car.  Stuff as many humans as possible onto the train, then add 50 more.  I stood the entire way, the majority of the time being pushed and elbowed and kicked as people try to (for some undefined reason) move around inside the car. Mira was the beneficiary of divine fate, and had a seat, but even then was being squished by me.  All in all, a miserable ride.  Two lessons learned: book in advance, and get the best class possible.  Seems obvious, but sometimes you’ve got to learn the hard way!   (Yes, D & A, I hear you laughing at us soft tourists.  I don’t know how you guys traveled like that so often!)  

When we booked our seats for the second trip, the tickets were actually waiting list and not confirmed.  Did the ticket guy tell us this???  Of course not!  He just grunted and pushed the tickets at us.  Only through Mira’s dilligence, and the aid of a friendly local, were we able to understand this.  We had to return that night to confirm, which we did.  Ahhh, the joys of 2nd class… we has beds and were even able to nap en route! 

Fishbowl

Those who have traveled to developing countries know the concept well.  As a obvious foreigner, you are constantly the center of attention.  This is commonly known as the ”fishbowl effect”.  For all, especially those like us who are not extroverts, this becomes extremely tiring.  You can’t go anywhere without people offering you things, talking to you, staring at you, etc etc etc.  Anonymity is a beautiful and underappreciated thing.

The fishbowl effect, as expected, has been quite strong here.  We represent a large profit opportunity.  There have been a couple of surprises, however.  First, the staring.  People will stand 5 feet in front of you, directly facing you, and just stare.  And stare.  And stare.  No qualms whatsoever.   You can try to outstare them, but they have no intention of looking away.  Very unnerving.  Second, Mira has received far more attention than I.  Way more.  I expected the whitey to draw more of the attention, for obvious reasons.  Unfortunately, it has been exactly the opposite.  You would think Mira was a Bollywood star.  It’s been pretty hard on her, and I really wish it were different.  We’re not really sure of the cause, but likely it’s because she is brown and with a white guy, which is apparently a rare scenario here.  Which leads me to my next topic…

Missing Generation

One of the more disturbing stories we’ve heard on our trip concerns the plight of Indian baby girls.  It’s a story that made international headlines years ago due to a popular book and press coverage.  Depending upon whose stats you believe, there are roughly 8 girls for every 10 boys born here.  In high school biology, we learned that the probability of bearing a girl is actually slightly greater than a boy.  Sooooo, where do those 2+ of 10 girls go?  Tragically, they are either aborted (first using ultrasound to determine sex), or they are killed upon birth (traditionally drowned in milk,  opacity ensuring that the drowner doesn’t have to watch the little baby suffer).  Clearly, boys are the favored sex in Indian culture.  We haven’t heard a good explanation why.  The feeling is deeply rooted in the culture.  Though very acute here, the problem is not unique to India.  Very sad, indeed.

Travel is good

Not wanting to end on that sour note, and realizing in retrospect the somewhat negative nature of this post, I wanted to end with ”travel is good”.  Despite the hardships, it is so refreshing to expand your horizons.  Travel is such an amazing way to reset your expectations of life.  It’s one of those things that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense on paper, but in the end works out to be the best thing you’ve ever done.  Sort of like what I hear about having kids

So rush out now and book that trip you’ve been dreaming of!